This post is about to get real. I mostly just need to get my recent thoughts out explicitly and semi-eloquently (AKA you’re reading my interweb diary hah).

Lately I’ve been thinking about jobs/money/how I spend my time

image via google, quote via Bill Cunningham in his documentary (on Netflix)

& I’ve decided, I never ever ever want to do anything for the money. I want to be a life freelancer, as in I do whatever I want, whenever I want and however I want without ever having to think about money as the great motivator or thread that ties us together (vom). 

Thinking about how I got to where I am, I have yet to give in to that ish:

I was a camp counselor because I loved the kids, the outdoors, the s’mores, the community

I volunteered at Star Island because I loved the people, the outdoors, the fun, the New Hampshire mentality

I pursue and work at unpaid fashion-related internships because I love fashion, the artistry, the culture, the glamour 

I make DIY projects because I like the satisfaction and pride of making things yourself, I’ve never tried to sell any of it

I cut hair because it’s fun, and doing something for free feels good

I never want to do anything because I have to. Many people pursue careers with the mentality to “work to live”, however, I want to live to work. I want my lifestyle and “job” to mesh so much that I can’t see the difference between the two— in the most enjoyable way possible.

I like to think of money as a necessity, as merely the thing I need to do what I want. Making it doesn’t satisfy me and money doesn’t make you “rich”. Being “rich” is determined by your relationships, your fun, your vitamin D level, and your time. As I grow older, I aim to live less and less ostentatiously- in 6th grade I built a dream model home that literally took up the entire board surface area we were allotted that included a dance studio and movie theater (wtf? who was I?) and now I just want to grow up and live in New Hampshire #livefreeordie.

I realize this post may be a little narrow-minded because it seems as though I don’t worry about money, when actuality I am constantly worried about it. I track my expenses daily on my own excel file. I am a good saver and am able to create, manage and follow a budget, however, I have been fortunate and privileged enough to have lots of financial support from various sources (my dad, jobs, scholarships, stipends etc.) and realize that many are not as lucky.

But at the end of the day, I just wanna do whatever the hell I want.